Things you didn't want to know. :-)
Dec 25, 2002 12:28:40 GMT -5
Post by UberCranky on Dec 25, 2002 12:28:40 GMT -5
In an attempt to impress the ladies and get a date for Christmas, some of the HabsRus bachelors decided to show their male physiques. They are currently in jail, attempting to preserve their virginity.
In a related incident, BadCompany got a little too drunk and brought home his latest date. He said he knew there was something wrong when his date was barking at him more the usuall.
I am not sure, but I believe PTH is now a married man.
Why can't they be gentleman like HabWest?
I am currently having problems getting my latest shipment of St. Savard dolls. Apparently, my request for steel cahones made the dolls a little heavy.
Montreal is preparing his next Prospects Report.
Don't forget, the Boo Club is opening in January with lots of lovely ladies.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
And finally....
Please note some changes in Christmas and Hanukkah.
Continuing the current trend of large-scale mergers and acquisitions, it was announced today at a press conference that Christmas and Hanukkah will merge. An industry source said that the deal had been in the works about 1300 years. While details were not available at press time, it is believed that the overhead cost of having twelve days of Christmas and eight days of Hanukkah was becoming prohibitive for both sides. By combining forces, we're told, the world will be able to enjoy consistently high-quality service during the Fifteen Days of Chrismukah, as the new holiday is being called.
Massive layoffs are expected, with lords a-leaping and maids a-milking being the hardest hit. As part of the conditions of the agreement, the letters on the dreidel, currently in Hebrew, will be replaced by Latin, thus becoming unintelligible to a wider audience.
Also, instead of translating to "A great miracle happened there," the message on the dreidel will be the more generic: "Miraculous stuff happens." In exchange, it is believed that Jews will be allowed to use Santa Claus and his vast merchandising resources for buying and delivering their gifts.
One of the sticking points holding up the agreement for at least three hundred years was the question of whether Jewish children could leave milk and cookies for Santa even after having eaten meat for dinner. A breakthrough came last year, when Oreos were finally declared to be Kosher. All sides appeared happy about this.
Fortunately for all concerned, he said, Kwanzaa will help to maintain the competitive balance. He then closed the press conference by leading all present in a rousing rendition of "Oy Vey, All Ye Faithful."
In a related incident, BadCompany got a little too drunk and brought home his latest date. He said he knew there was something wrong when his date was barking at him more the usuall.
I am not sure, but I believe PTH is now a married man.
Why can't they be gentleman like HabWest?
I am currently having problems getting my latest shipment of St. Savard dolls. Apparently, my request for steel cahones made the dolls a little heavy.
Montreal is preparing his next Prospects Report.
Don't forget, the Boo Club is opening in January with lots of lovely ladies.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
And finally....
Please note some changes in Christmas and Hanukkah.
Continuing the current trend of large-scale mergers and acquisitions, it was announced today at a press conference that Christmas and Hanukkah will merge. An industry source said that the deal had been in the works about 1300 years. While details were not available at press time, it is believed that the overhead cost of having twelve days of Christmas and eight days of Hanukkah was becoming prohibitive for both sides. By combining forces, we're told, the world will be able to enjoy consistently high-quality service during the Fifteen Days of Chrismukah, as the new holiday is being called.
Massive layoffs are expected, with lords a-leaping and maids a-milking being the hardest hit. As part of the conditions of the agreement, the letters on the dreidel, currently in Hebrew, will be replaced by Latin, thus becoming unintelligible to a wider audience.
Also, instead of translating to "A great miracle happened there," the message on the dreidel will be the more generic: "Miraculous stuff happens." In exchange, it is believed that Jews will be allowed to use Santa Claus and his vast merchandising resources for buying and delivering their gifts.
One of the sticking points holding up the agreement for at least three hundred years was the question of whether Jewish children could leave milk and cookies for Santa even after having eaten meat for dinner. A breakthrough came last year, when Oreos were finally declared to be Kosher. All sides appeared happy about this.
Fortunately for all concerned, he said, Kwanzaa will help to maintain the competitive balance. He then closed the press conference by leading all present in a rousing rendition of "Oy Vey, All Ye Faithful."